The first presidential debate between President Donald Trump and Democratic nominee Joe Biden is scheduled to take place on September 29, just two weeks away. As such, Trump is busy preparing in the lead up to this important event — by accusing Biden of taking drugs.
“‘Ya caught me, Don!'” quipped Late Show host Stephen Colbert on Tuesday, donning aviator sunglasses to perform an impersonation of Biden. “‘I’ve been juicing. Tomato, beet, prune. I’m as regular as the atomic clock, Jack!'”
If you thought Trump might have a reasonable basis for his speculation then I’m sorry to disappoint you, but also that’s kind of your bad for assuming he’d have a reasonable basis for anything. Speaking to the Washington Examiner, Trump stated he thought Biden might be on drugs because he participated in a “normal boring debate” against Bernie Sanders, in which “nothing amazing happened.”
“Trump thinks anyone who shows basic competency must be cheating,” said Colbert, before switching to his impersonation of Trump. “‘Well did you see Biden jog up that ramp without tripping once? He’s gotta be ‘roiding. Plus he drank his water with just one hand. It’s like they ground up Lance Armstrong and injected it into his neck.'”
Trump also compared the debate to a “prizefight” or gladiatorial combat, which admittedly is a hilarious mental image.
“You’re not a gladiator,” Colbert bluntly stated. “They fought lions. You brag about identifying one on a piece of paper.”